Temptations are what we're made up of. Temptation for happiness, joy, wealth, hunger, adventure, lust and fear.
As they say, The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. As I grew up to be 7 years old, I started realizing the feeling, My temptation being Food.
At unusual hours, I was hungry. I started eating, a lot.
I was eating till a point where my body couldn't take it anymore, but I was still tempted, to eat more.
I started feeling sick afterwards, vomiting my guts out in the washroom, barely on my feet while tears rolled down my cheeks. I had severe stomach aches, I was eating a lot, still I started loosing weight, I was thirsty, all the time.
It was all strange for me, an unusual feeling when you realize something is wrong with you, but you can't do anything about it.
I remember laying down on my bed. I had a severe stomach ache. My grandmother sat by my side, caressing my hair as I held on to her. She placed a hot water pack on my stomach. I was trying hard to be strong, but the pain was unbearable. I looked at her and asked Why am I hurting ? She looked down at me, her white hair dropping down on my forehead as she said "You have a big worm in your tummy, who always keeps his mouth open, waiting for you to eat something so that it could gobble all of the stuff you eat." I was sobbing, trying to hold on to my cry and I held her tighter .It was quiet.
She gave me some medicines, all in vain. The pain wasn't just going away. I held on to her till late at night. She kept her hand on my head, trying to comfort me.
Pain felt like eternity, when your brain tries to shut down your body, but the pain keeps you up, reminding you of every passing moment till you pass out.
I don't remember when I dozed off to sleep.
The next morning, I woke up perfectly fine, no aches at all, like I never had any pain.
I shrugged it off, and carried on with my day.
My diet increased, drastically. At times, my mother used to get mad at me for eating all day.
I had no idea.
My grandparents were still worried about the worms in my stomach, so I had a lot of home remedies and over the counter medicines. When it didn't get any better, my parents finally decided to take me to a doctor.
Waves of Air touched my face as we were on our way to a Doctor in a nearby city, Dehradun. The passing cars looked so small from a distance. Growing bigger as they came closer, and then bid us farewell as they went on with their journey.
Doctor Diwan was an old man with grey hair. In his late 70s, he had a sage look on his face, with thick glasses on his eyes. He looked at me and smiled. I smiled back. He prescribed me a bunch of tests.
I used to hate syringes back then, but little did I know that they are gonna be my new best friends, for the rest of my life. It was late at night, we drove back home, I slept in the back seat.
The following evening, Father received a call from the Laboratories. The tests were out.
When I saw father that night, he looked tormented.
Barely, he was trying to hold it together. I could see the inept fretfulness on his face when he carried me to my room. We both sat on my bed. It was winters in December. There was a pile of quilts on my bed.
I was getting cozy, trying to fit my feet in the quilts, when he held my hand.
With a staid gaze, he looked at me and said, "I want to tell you something." I looked up to him.
"You're a Diabetic." , He said.
There was an unsettling calmness in the room. With a deep throat, he said that the doctors diagnosed that I am a diabetic, and they found it quite alarming at an age, this young.
I had no clue. I could feel my feet getting warmer in the quilt. I was trying to pay attention. I asked him what does that mean.
He said "You might have to take injections twice a day"
On hearing that, a sudden sense of panic took over me. I looked at him, anxious to a certain extent.
I could just say "I'm afraid of needles"
He cuddled me so tight. I said again, "But I do not want to take injections." He embraced me even tighter. I could feel he was sad.
That evening I saw an entire new chapter, being unfolded in my life.
I rapidly felt a surge of sadness.
I knew it didn't mean good and it's going to affect my future and my family.
I hugged him back when he said it will all be fine.
He hugged me while i slept.